Last weeks edition of the "Kat and Mick Report" reported that you were organizing a small protest against two members of the Turkey bowl Cheerleading squad for violations of qualification. After attending my sons football game this Friday night I was inspired with a solution and would be willing to act as mediator in this dispute. The solution is a simple one and would be a real crowd pleaser. The two violators in question Janel Englebert and Trixie Sobieck could be the "flyers" on the team. Flyers are simply the runts and Olive Oils of the team who are on the top of the pyramids or are often seen being thrown in the air by the REAL squad. Having been inducted into the family by marriage and more than qualifying with the weight requirement I would take quite the pleasure in throwing skinny frail women into the air. Of course I am certain that these waifs would go uninjured because we would all be excellent catchers insuring the Flyers a safe landing. I can envision it now, Trixie (who by the way has the perfect name for her new squad position) could do all sorts of flips, turns and Trix as she fly's through the air with the greatest of ease after being vaulted by the core squad and landing gently into their arms.
Signed:
Tennessee Mediator Extrordinaire
PS We southerners are excellent mediators just ask the Hatfields and McCoys
Dear Mediator,
I can find no fault with your plan and it should work well. The two women in question can certainly climb atop the pyramids however the pyramid can only be two tiers high considering that the rest of the squad will adhere to the suggested weight requirement.
That's all the news that is news, see ya.
E
ven though is has been some time since Joanne Lade has raised a child she will be back in the saddle again so to speak. The Lades have brought home their new puppy from Illinois this weekend.
The Lades had purchased the dog weeks ago but were unable to bring it home until it had completed it's schooling. The pup has been paper trained among other things and is fully capable of living indoors. Also included in his training were Frisbee catching, cat chasing and automobile driving.
The latter training chosen by Joanne Lade as she is increasingly finding herself without a driver after visiting the local watering hole after work since Tim is employed school bus driving. Lade figures that having a third member of the family driving would be a good
idea. Since the dog was trained in Illinois however he may have to retest when it comes time to renew his license in Wisconsin.
Joanne Lade
The Lade's cat Niko will co-exist with the new pet in the Lade household which has been his sole domain since his introduction in 2005. When asked about
the new inhabitant Niko refused comment opting instead for catnip offered Joanne.
Tim Lade seems to be just as excited as Joanne about the prospect of having a new puppy around the house and even before picking him up he had selected and spread out various shoes of Joanne's around the house for the new arrival to chew on. Tim commented, "I raised a few children during my life and have found that I get along a lot better with animals."
Lade a school bus driver when having trouble with children on his bus tried the method suggested by the Kat whereby she rewards older children on the
Niko
bus to use brute force to keep younger children in line while she looks the other way giving her plausible deniability. Somehow this method had not worked well on Tim's bus probably because the children are not retarded as on Kat's bus.
Lade has developed his own method of dealing with the offending high schoolers using drugs and alcohol as rewards, and he reports a high rate of success thus avoiding the socially unacceptable use of violence employed by the Kat. Lade reports oxy Contin is the most sought after by the teens although it is increasingly harder to get.
