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November 15, 2009

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                     ith major media outlet The Kat and Mick Report covering the Turkey Bowl on it's weekly newsletter other lower forms of media such as newspapers and television have opted out of covering the annual game between the Oneida Red Gobblers and The Hobart Blue Jell-O's. With the coming of the ten year anniversary of the XPFL the other media has deemed the story too good to pass up.

A photographer from the Green Bay Press Gazette will be on hand to snap a few photos from the sidelines for publication in the daily morning paper.  The Press Gazette long known to cover that other football team in town is trying to make inroads in the XPFL so that if that other team loses so much popularity that they would disband the paper would not be without a professional league to cover.

Preparations for the Turkey Bowl ten year anniversary continue with work on the field scheduled to start next weekend. Color commentator Dave Poquette is due into town on Saturday evening making the trip from Clarksville, TN in his pickup truck avoiding the use of plane
A katandmick photo
travel. Poquette is expected to be on hand to help line the field and prepare for the ten year football extravaganza, as well as his usual free of charge service of handing out corporal punishment to the children. One of Poquette's favorite schemes is to extend his arm with thumb and forefinger forming a semicircle then inviting 
small children to "put your neck in here". Once the unsuspecting child falls for the bait he or she is in for 60 seconds of wriggling, red faces, and chocking, then just before their oxygen deprived brain gives up and they drop to the floor unconscious, Poquette gives them a reprieve with a stern warning not to do it again. Few children take advantage of a second invitation.

Crowds on game day are expected to be large this year with the announcement that the girls from The Oval Office will be visiting before their Thanksgiving Day performance at the down town club. One cheerleader obviously intimidated by the visiting sex symbols immediately offered to give up her post to
Dave Poquette
the dancers. Trixie Sobieck suggested that "If those girls are there then, shouldn't they be the cheerleaders?" However a quick examination of the charter and rules of the XPFL cheerleaders revealed that no cheerleader can be flimsy. Although the word "flimsy" is not clearly defined in the
charter one would assume the founders clearly wanted the larger more stout women to form the cheerleading squads. If a comparison is made between the two then there is no question following those guidelines.
Trixie Sobieck
After the decision was confirmed that XPFL cheerleaders would remain the same, Blue Jell-O squad leader Jean Poquette Hansen became
concerned that attention would still be focused on the girls from the Oval Office. Poquette-Hansen: "If those girls are going to be there then whose going to look at us, now we really have to get our uniforms bedazzled." Poquette-Hansen a ten year veteran of the Turkey
Bowl usually goes head to head with her opposition and sister Trixie Sobieck a Red Gobbler cheerleader. The two are no strangers to violence with Sobieck usually assaulting Poquette-Hansen on the sidelines during a vulnerable moment. Again this is entertainment we would not get to see from the girls of The Oval Office.
Jean Poquette-Hansen
Game day spectators accustomed to the violence pay no attention to Sobieck and Poquette-Hansen embroiled in an assault.
Players get up slow after play action during the game
One week from today the press box is expected to be put up, and the bleachers may arrive that day as well. Lining of the field is put off as long as possible to preserve the lines. A window between next Sunday and the day before the game will be considered subject to the weather. League Commissioner Brandon Pickett is expected to announce the lining date next week.
A katandmick photo