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February 17, 2013
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A katandmick photo
                       ave Krueger has always been one to go against the grain, so it came as no surprise to his wife Darla (Kevin Sobieck's sister) when Krueger disobeyed advice while on vacation in Mexico. 

Darla Krueger recently covered her chair and let the other girls handle the overflow at her wildly popular beauty shop "Shear Dementia" on West Mason St.
in Green Bay. Krueger 50, and her husband Dave 55,  have dreamed for months about taking a nice warm vacation in Mexico this winter. What Krueger didn't dream of was seeing her husband held hostage by monkeys. Terrified and in tears Krueger pleaded with the monkeys holding
her husband hostage to let him go. They eventually did, but not before some tough negotiations.

Krueger was warned before entering the area about the monkeys and not to feed them. He didn't listen, bringing a huge bag full of banana's, dates, and counterfeit twinkees (only because Hostess is out of business and he couldn't get the real ones) Krueger made his way to the monkey slums. Before you know it the monkeys spotted him and his loot. Within a minute he was surrounded by the furry creatures who demanded satisfaction. Krueger tried to convince them there was enough for everyone, but the hairy primates intimated him even further, another monkey pulled up on his bicycle and pulled a Glock pistol from his belt.

Darla, seeing what was unfolding before her eyes did the only thing she could in the face of this danger. She pulled out her emergency beauty kit and began offering free grooming to the agitated monkeys. Upon having their fur combed and their nails trimmed professionally the primates eventually began to ease their grip on the tight hold they had on Dave Krueger.
Beauty professional Darla Krueger
One would think Dave Krueger would utilize his wife's beauty knowledge to make himself look a little better, but alas monkeys will have their way with him anyway.
Darla kept up her flurry of beauty activity as she washed their coats one by one trimming the hair on their tails and eyebrows. Soon the monkeys, one by one began to show Darla their red buttocks, a sign of friendliness welcoming her to get to know them better. Darla kept her mind open but did not allow the monkeys to get too friendly with her though.

In the mean time, Dave slinked away from the threatening primates managing only to salvage one banana for himself. Darla escaped as well while the apes struggled to figure out how scissors worked, trying to make their feet work in the holes designed for thumbs. As she fled she looked back to see the chimps giving each other permanent's. Older chimps seemed attracted to the blue hair dye in her bag she noticed while looking back. Darla told Dave to listen from now on and that she would not be bailing him out again on this vacation if he gets in trouble again from not heeding the warning given by the natives. She had lost one beauty kit already would would not loose another.

That's all the news that is news, see ya.